Dangerous Discontent

I was reminded the other day about how easy it is to fall into discontentment.  It all started with my self-centered reflections of the things I wished I had done in my life.  You know the kind.  It's starts innocently enough.  "I wish I knew how to...", which then turns into "Why didn't I learn when..." which can be a very destructive downward spiral of "what ifs" and "I wish this was different.."

We all do it.  Here's where my mind wandered that day:

"I wish I had taken voice lessons in college. I also wish I would have taken a music-writing class.  Well dang, I should have just majored in music.  Then I would have more in common with more people and I could sing and write music and be famous and, and, and..."

It just kept going on from there.  But then, I stopped myself. And I took an inventory of what I DID do, back when I COULD have been majoring in music.  I majored in business finance instead. I got married to guy who probably wouldn't have wanted to hang out with a music major ;) If I hadn't married that guy, we wouldn't have the two awesome kids we have.  And I would not know anything about the supporting role I've assumed in running a business for that guy.  Because music majors don't learn accounting, taxes, banking, or budgeting.

And THAT is why I didn't major in music.  Took me about 11 years to realize it. Wait, no. I knew it all along. I just forgot while I was wallowing in discontent.

It's great when God stops you in your tracks of self-delusion and shows WHY you are where you are. And I am where I am because it's the right place to be, and the steps that led me here were the right steps to take.

Read less, read more, write more

I've decided. Although my decisions rarely stick long term, I still like to pretend. So I've decided to refocus my media time.

Less reading (on Facebook). Also less participating in other Facebook activities. Just less TIME in general on Facebook. As much as I enjoy the feedback (attention) I get from being funny, silly, or generally idiotic, it's such a big time-waster for me. I can receive that same validation in other areas. So, for a while, I'll back away. It never lasts long, I'll admit that. I'll delete the app from my phone until I "need" to check on something, someone, etc. Then I'm back. But I'm trying.

More reading (real books). I've started using the iBooks app and downloading a plethora of free classic titles. Last summer I read about 10 classic novels including "The Count of Monte Cristo," the entire "Anne of Green Gables" series, and several Jane Austen books. I also started a Chronological Bible-reading plan 107 days ago that I am enjoying immensely. Try reading the Bible chronologically someday in a "readers version" like New Living Translation. It flows so much like a story and really keeps you interested. Maybe even more if you are a history nerd like me!

More writing: I'm hoping to write here on my blog more. I love it so much when a blog post comes out the way I imagine. I enjoy hearing from readers that I impact with my posts. I have never particularly loved to write, but always got decent grades on papers and such. And sometimes I just have things to say. So this time, I replaced my Facebook app with the blogger app (with iBooks and YouVersion Bible right next to it) and will try to record my daily life anecdotes and such right here. Really it's for me. I love to go back a year or two and read stuff I wrote. Sometimes I don't even recognize it! Thing that seemed important when I wrote them are already forgotten. I'm thankful for a platform like this where I can record life and then go back and review it.

So that's what's UP.